Archive for the ‘Driving’ Category

Special Snow Flakes

Monday, October 13th, 2014

I’m not quite sure what it is with drivers. I, personally, don’t think people have the realization that when they get behind the wheel of a car they’re in a ton and a half killing machine. I know I don’t think of it sometimes that way too, so I’m not immune. But I always try really really hard to pay attention.

However, my problem has been around more the parts of people yielding when there’s no yield and stopping when there’s no stop sign. Yet, they’ll go when there’s a yield and go when there’s a stop sign. It’s very frustrating.

Couple cases in point. If there’s a right turn lane, and a little island like thing between the right turn lane and the go straight lane, please look to see if there’s a yield sign. If there isn’t, do a quick check to see that you have a lane to accelerate in. Chances are good, if I’m behind you and you come to a stop when there’s no yield sign, you’re getting a horn blast. And don’t look at me like it’s my fault, you’re not a special snow flake, pay attention to the road.

Likewise, if you’re coming up to an intersection, and you don’t see a stop sign, look for signage that states whether other people stop as well. There are such things as three way stops with one direction of traffic not having to stop. Yes, this does in fact present some problems, as in other people may not be aware, because they’re special snow flakes too, and think you have to stop; because they in turn didn’t read the signage below the stop that said “3-way Stop” “Incoming traffic does not stop” ( Seen at multiple malls ), so they may go as well. So be weary, but for the love of all that’s right, don’t stop when you don’t have to.

Also, one of the other things people seem to be completely oblivious on, four way stop etiquette as well as what happens when you come to an intersection where the lights are out ( *SPOILER ALERT* It’s a four way stop ).

Go speed racer, go!

Tuesday, September 4th, 2007

I was on my way to visit a customer.  I’m driving on 15 south, just passing the outlet mall.  I look to my right, as I’m in the left lane; no cars, I look back – a wall of black is in front of me.

I was driving behind, not tailgating, but a more than comfortable margin behind a work pickup truck, I didn’t pay much attention to what it’s load was, but it had one of those tubed frames, ladder hanging off it, etc.   When I turned my head back, this wall of black disintegrates in front of me in to 4 or 5 large pieces of black siding, not little siding like on the side of a house, but 2 feet wide and about 12 feet long.  Both hands on 10 and 2 quickly become hands at 1 and 5, my tires squeal under protest at such a sharp swerve at 50 to 55 miles per hour – god my balding tires, please don’t lose traction, rushes through my head.  The wind that the siding has picked up having flipped off this truck help a little bit and move the pieces to the left a little, I’m riding two lanes, the panels pass me at eye height a half foot or two from my window.

The danger passed, the truck in front of me puts on his breaks but isn’t stopping, fat lot of good that’s going to do, I check the rear view mirror and see people swerving over to the right lane.  I expected to feel an adrenalin rush, much like the time there was a braking incident getting back on to 95 from the Springfield Mall, but there wasn’t anything, disappointing.

Ramble on my good man.

Thursday, October 27th, 2005

Instead of the previously scheduled story that I was going to write, something about drivers and people who are idiots behind the wheel, I’ve decided to scratch that as it’s not pertinent any more and the ire and vitriol I held within me has slowly seeped out from me to be replaced by an almost afable manner in which to continue. However, as talkative as I might wish to be, my meandering will not be coherent in the least.

In case I haven’t made it clear, as I’ve not really posted a topic on it, I do have a 3rd cat now, affectionately named #3. If I were a little bit older you could almost call me a crazy cat guy, but that doesn’t sound nearly as good as crazy cat lady – plus it wouldn’t be true, I’m quite sane, just a little off my rocker. #3 is quite affectionate, although, much like every other cat, she’s a total slut and will go to whoever will pet her and pay attention to her the most.

As for #1 and #2 they’re both fine, even though they had been house ridden for a few weeks while I gave antibiotics to #1 for whatever encounter caused her to start limping. Also, with the return to the outdoors was the return of unwated dead animals, in particular moles, and I’m still note quite sure if it’s easier to clean the kitty little box or to pick up a dead mole. The picking up of dead animals doesn’t really bother me it’s just that I’m worried if I miss one, then I have to find it and dispose of it – after the smell has already happened.

Get back in your god damned car.

Friday, August 27th, 2004

Last night, after handing Bill his ass at racquetball twice, despite his lucky ass come back streaks that didn’t quite pan out, I was heading to Chantilly to pick up some rather expensive, yet very nice, fencing shoes. Maybe it was because I was all hyped up, had the blood pounding through the veins, Bill and I had some good rounds that lasted a while, so maybe the testosterone was going too. I took 15S from Ida Lee to 7E so that I could hook on to Catoctin and possibly avoid any jam up from 7W going to 15 extension S before the toll road.

Here I am, coming up to a red light. The car in front of me, I notice had stopped and then rolled forward a little bit and *tap* hits the car in front of her. We’re not talking rammed in to, or blindly going down the street and slamming in to someone. We’re talking someone who stopped then rolled a little bit and hit the car in front of them. They had to of been going two maybe three miles per hour. I knew what was going to happen and my blood was already boiling.

This retard, the one that got hit, as I clearly mark this as an accident ( in the sense of “oops, sorry” nothing is damaged or hurt by it ) on the part of the driver in the rear, I’ve been there, I’ve done that, shit happens, gets out of his car and starts inspecting his vehicle. By this point, my window is already down, I shout out “Get back in to your car, nothings wrong with it, let’s get a move on.” And by shout, I mean I shouted it to make sure that that prick could clearly understand me. I had places to go, people to see, expensive shoes to pick up – by which, I mean, they’re the most expensive shoes I’ve ever purchased, and I knew that there was nothing wrong with his car, he should have given the lady a dirty look in his rear view mirror, seen that the lady was apologetic and moved on with his worthless, miserable, fucking life.

Eek!! Slippin’ and sliddin’

Wednesday, July 28th, 2004

The last two days have been wet, if not quite a torrential downpour. Both days I’ve nearlly gotten in to a fender bender. As in I’m travelling downhill, on wet pavement, fortunately at a good distance away when for no apparent reason, the person in front of me decides to slow down. Either I’m not paying attention, or well, I’m not paying attention. However, both times, I’ve locked up my brakes and started sliding. Once was on Sunset Hills, when with no blinker, and I’d swear his brake lights didn’t work, this pick-em-up truck turned right. The last one was this morning, and it really pissed me off, I hate when people slow down for accidents. Maybe it’s just me, maybe I alone, out of the millions of people that drive, can drive past an accident at speed and get a quick view of what’s going on, without having to slow down…I don’t know.

Anyway, today, on the Greenway, once again going down hill, a good 10 or 15 car lengths in front of me, this white SUV deicides at that particular moment they were going to slow down to look at this car that had banged up against the guard rail. On went my brakes, knowing that the pavement was slippery, I applied a little more pressure, then the tires lost traction. It was just one big anus clinching adventure…the only thing that ticked me off is no adrenalin was kicking off, so I couldn’t even get a natural high. I almost felt like I was a back street driver, my body was just doing the things it needed to do while I sat in the back just processing if I could get over in to the other lane to avoid this SUV. Only to calculate that if I had to get over in to the other lane my momentum would end up causing me to hit the car that was slightly in front of the SUV. Then I thought of the median, even if it meant getting stuck there. Fortunately, within the half second to a second all of this took, I realized that even with my sliding on the pavement I’d end up coming to a stop right on the bumper of the SUV, if the SUV slowed down any more. So, I finally decided to let everything take its natural course, and here I am at work to tell you all about my wonderful day so far!

Oh yeah, the SUV was white too, only strengthening my opinion that people who drive white vehicles are mentally deficient in some way that make them poor drivers.

Something else to be bitter at.

Tuesday, June 29th, 2004

Driving home yesterday, all seemed well. I got out of the office slightly early, maybe by 15 minutes or s
o. I’m driving down the toll road, no real problems. Sometimes you have the idiots that crawl through the
open gates at the toll booth to get on to the greenway, not today though.

I’m driving down the greenway, thinking of several things that need to get done today, or calls that I ne
ed to make or will hopefully receive. Out of no where I see this big black ball, by ball about the size o
f a musket load, for those of you that haven’t seen one…think maybe the size of a shooting marble ( ya
know, marbles on the ground ), slightly smaller than a rubber bouncy ball that you play jacks with, flyin
g at my car. SMASH, right in to the windshield.

Now I have a nice little sunburst, thankfully out of the area I’d normally look, it stretches about two i
nches across, with a decent sized impact zone.

I’ll be queer and take pictures of it, because that will get me out there to take pictures of the cicada
in my back window that I need to come up with a name for as well.

Dumb bitch.

Monday, June 7th, 2004

To the individual/female driving the Ford Contour with Virginia license plate number ADP 3637, please learn to fucking drive. Until such time, please consider yourself a fucking dumb ass that doesn’t deserve to share the same road as I do, much less the same air I breath. Pay FUCKING attention at the GOD DAMNED GREEN LIGHT that you’ve been staring at for 10 FUCKING SECONDS. The only reason why I didn’t get out of my car and physically throw you off the fucking overpass, besides all the paperwork involved, at the Reston exit on the Toll road is because you went through the yellow/pink light and I was on your ass the whole way. You stupid fucking cow.

Learn what the fucking gas pedal is too. Learn to read a god damned speed limit sign. When it says 35 FUCKING MILES PER HOUR, then drive 40 you stupid bitch, not half of 40 for fucks sake.

We now return you to your previously scheduled website.

I know … I know

Thursday, March 4th, 2004

Even though it’s a recurring theme…Why are stupid people allowed to live? Get the fuck over and quit riding in the left lane…and jesus h christ, would it be too much to ask for you to use your thinking machine to realize, “oh wow, twenty billion people just passed me on the right, maybe I should get over!”


On the bright side…if there is one, only one idiot in 4 days of driving.

My Trip, by Jason C. Hill

Friday, December 5th, 2003

I went outside today.

I shovelled my driveway today. When I shovelled my driveway I got tired. I was wearing my big warm coat. I was warm.

I got in my car and drove over the big pile of snow that the mean shovel plow doo-doo head guy left in my driveway. I don’t like the big mean shovel plow guy. He’s a mean doo-doo head.

I went driving today.

When I was out driving today I saw 5 ( holding up my hand shoing you all five fingers splayed out in a very eager manner ) cars either in the ditch or in the median. Those people are stupid doo-doo heads. I don’t like the stupid people. They’re stupid because they can’t drive in three inches of snow. I drive good. I drive even gooder in snow.

I went outside today, it was fun.

My Trip,

By Jason C. Hill Age – 3 … 0 *grr*

My Loathing of PA Turnpike.

Friday, December 6th, 2002

Matt ended up getting up early Sunday morning, he probably just wanted to kick me out of the house. Lord knows I hate having people in my house for more than a day, so I can’t blame him. I brushed off my car, again, scraped off the ice, let the car warm up, then packed my stuff and took off. As I was approaching 77 south, I kept thinking to myself that I should go down 77 and hook up to 70 East and just take that to 79 south back to 68 at Mogantown. It would have added an extra 80 or so miles to my drive, and in the long run, I think it would have been less frustrating.

The problem with the PA Turnpike, is ever since I strated using it, back in college to get to VA, I have yet to go through it without having to come to a stand still. And the thing is, it’s not like it’s due to an accident, I just seriously think that the people that take the road just become the biggest idiots in the world, larger than normal, yes!

Fortunately, and later unfortunately, I had stopped off at the Kent exit to fuel up and to get some road sodas, the unfortunate part comes later.